SINCE FEBRUARY is the month for Valentines, let’s take a moment
and consider what makes certain men attractive to women. Attraction, in
brief, is simply when someone feels a romantic impulse towards another.
It is the first step in building a meaningful relationship. What follows
are chemistry, connection, compromise and commitment. Initially, if a
woman is attracted to you, and you to her, you have accomplished the simplest
and most elusive building block in a relationship.
I have met many men over the years, and have studied the nature of what is attractive to women. Initially, each woman (and man) has a certain “type” that triggers the potential for attraction. This does not mean that if you don’t fit that type that you are out of luck. It does mean that your chances of engaging her in a flirtatious conversation increase. As a man, it is very hard to know what type a particular woman is attracted to – and there is only one way to find out – initiate a conversation with her. The best way to increase your chances with women is to increase the attractiveness of your world and the daily life you lead.
Women, intuitively, are looking for a man that fulfills her innate need for security. This is why insecure men have trouble attracting a mate. A secure man tends to embody a sense of humor, focus/determination, leadership, humility and vulnerability. Healthy, attractive women crave this combination. These traits are challenging for many men, which is why I believe a guy who struggles with women is living out of balance with himself. His outlook is normally negative, and he seems to respond to life, rather than act or move towards it. Insecurity is a result of being prey to negative emotions, such as depression, anger, envy, greed, lust etc. If a guy struggles with envy, he will find himself walking through the world comparing himself to everyone he meets, subtly fulfilling his internal prophecy of “I am not enough, look at that guy, he’s got it all…”
The essence to being an attractive man is being a positive man. If you are a guy who struggles with dating and relationships, you must ask yourself these essential questions:
* Do you see problems in front of you, or challenges?
* Are you willing to accept yourself as you are, for the moment, and take on the responsibility of creating a life that is truly your own?
* Are you focused on short-term survival, or long-term prosperity?
History proves that, biologically – and therefore, intuitively - women seek out men that give them a sense of security. In order for a man to provide this, he must be secure in himself. A secure man is an autonomous man…he is the elusive one within each of us who craves to call his life his own.
If you desire to persuade people into your life in order to build relationships, you will be far more compelling to others if what you are offering promises to be a positive experience for them. This is a simple sales model – in order to sell a product, it needs to promise a positive experience for the consumer. If your world is filled with positive emotions (humor, happiness, passion, to name a few) you will magnetically bring like-minded people into your life.
For example, when you are talking to a woman on the phone, and she asks you, “what’s up?” You might reply by painting an interesting and exciting view of the world in front of you – be original. Recently, I was chatting with a girlfriend of mine, and in the middle of the conversation, I described to her the very funny scene happening directly in front of me – which was of two kids playing with a puppy. It was a very humorous way to involve her into my life, one that helped her understand that I see the world as a lively and fun place, and that I am not afraid to share that with her. Doing things like this says a lot about you as a man.
Another great way to reflect a powerful image into the world is in how you dress. Look at your wardrobe. Are you up on the latest fashion? Is your look something you are proud of, that you enjoy? Does your look work for your career path? If not, you might want to consider at least enhancing your wardrobe a bit with some of the basics by buying a very nice pair of shoes, or a stylish pair of jeans for example. Or, seek out some help in defining a look which works with both your personality and lifestyle, and then find a way to incorporate that – hire an image consultant, get your stylish sister to go shopping with you, buy men’s magazines for ideas…the possibilities are endless here guys. Just remember, the most critical aspect in considering how you dress is to reflect your personality in a powerful way, that also works for the environment or scene that you are in. For example, it might not be best to wear a really cool t-shirt to your corporate job.
If you can be someone who sees the world in a positive light, you will naturally bring people closer to you. Men who are successful with women are those who are autonomous and embody a spirit of security by having a full, meaningful and positive lifestyle. In short, they are happy.
If you would like to know more about attraction, as well as receive some free dating, fashion, style and grooming advice, check out Cutting-Edge Image Consulting (CEIC) at www.ceimageconsulting.com. My colleague and co-founder, Mike, have both had the privilege of working with men all around the world in assisting them in meeting women, and in building an attractive and fulfilling lifestyle. We have recently released a state-of-the-art 7 CD audio program which covers the topics of attraction, connection, meeting women, dating strategies, fashion and style, and lifestyle cultivation, to name a few. We give you tried and true ways to enhance your communication, not only with women, but with anyone. We show you how to create a wardrobe which is both cool and powerful, even if you are on a tight budget. We help you understand how to meet women in any environment AND we give you precise things to say. Lastly, our program takes you through a series of exercises which are designed to help you clearly define why you want, and then create a plan to get it. Check out more details at: www.ceimageconsulting.com
Feel free to contact us if you have any questions – and don’t forget to sign-up for our mailing list!
Stephen
Stephen@ceimageconsulting.com
Stephen is co-founder of Cutting Edge Image Consulting,
Inc. (CEIC). Along with his colleague Mike, Stephen founded CEIC in order to
help men to present themselves in a powerful way, while creating and building
a successful, meaningful, lifestyle. He currently lives and works in New York
City. Please visit CEIC’s website at: www.ceimageconsulting.com
© Stephen
of CEIC 2005 - All rights reserved!
Real Romantic Rapport:
A Secret to True Seduction
By: Michael Twomey
Clients and Friends of mine that are interested in what I do, often ask me to help them in matters of Confidence, Romance, and Seduction.
I usually will ask them certain questions such as, “Do you want a lot of fake ways and tricks, or do you want to - learn the REAL WAY? Do you want to work long and hard or do you want a smart way that will give you better results in less time?"
Since Valentine's Day is right around the corne,r this article will offer some fun and valuable skills and tips to make this a memorable time. And even though flowers and chocolates might be nice they are not the REAL QUALITIES that will make things uniquely special.
And while you might be wondering about all this, and before I get into detail, I want to bring up something else that is very useful, because it will help to illustrate this point clearly so that you can get a better handle on it. Sounds like fun? Great! Keep reading.
Recently, a very famous late-night talk show host passed away. In fact, without even mentioning a name, certain memories are probably already having their effect. Perhaps you are feeling sad at the loss or a better yet, allowing a smile to form at some of the fond and humorous memories.
One of the things I remember about this Legend was how he was able to REMAIN CALM and MANAGE THE SITUATION. He had the ability to calibrate an audience's response whenever a joke bombed and seamlessly recover, TO GET EVEN BETTER LAUGHS. Without it he would be just another comedian.
And although I feel that A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR is vital to enjoying life and any good relationship, you don't need to be famous or be in the entertainment world to use these skills to better your life and the lives of those around you.
Best of all, you don't need to spend years and years to learn the most important ingredient. Are you CURIOUS yet? Great! Because that is part of the secret.
So how did he do this so well? And how can you learn this skill to help you with your interactions with people? How will you make this Valentine's Day the most Blissfully Memorable so far?…
Well, one of the theories and reasons for his great success was his soothing
voice.
Many people would watch the TV show with their loved one...and right before
drifting off to sleep. Some said it was almost like being tucked safely
and warmly into bed
and I bet you can think of a voice that makes you feel this way...
There are some people with great voices, including singers, and yet some are more successful than others. The REAL SECRET goes beyond techniques and skills like vocal quality, body language, certain facial expressions or a special look. These help to create an effect. Yet it is more about creating a BRIDGE from you to them.
Actually, you probably use many of these skills already. My girlfriend laughs even more when I make a certain facial expression, along with saying or doing something funny. She loves to laugh, and we laugh a lot together. As a skill set you probably know these as ANCHORS (A stimulus associated to an internal sensory response).
And she tells me there is that “SPECIAL look” that makes her melt...and of course I feel the same way. And that is the KEY. In fact there is this way she looks at me, and…well, back to the article and how it can help you.
You probably have had similar experiences, especially with loved ones, friends and certain performers that just seemed to touch in you in special ways. It was more than their words, their voices, and their looks or any "tricks of the trade" or "tools"
There is a very funny and fitting saying in the Entertainment World about the secret to success------Honesty/being Genuine----once you can fake this, the rest is easy.
Are you CONNECTING the dots yet? I highly recommend that you do, because it is ALL about Connecting with others. BEING GENUINE…and wanting to know about others…and what is important to them…and sharing this type of information with others.
This creates that BOND that can reach beyond time, space and any distance and make you feel like you know them and they know you. You can identify with them and what is happening in their life, which is more valuable than any box of chocolates ever could be. And if life is like a box of…(back to the article) ;-)
How much would you pay to know that this person understands what you are feeling and going through, and they are listening to you, and may even be able to and is willing to help? Well, guess what. You can have this. Yet, it's not for sale!
The feeling that YOU MATTER !!!! is a precious thing, becoming more and more rare in the chaotic and superficial times we are living in.
So, what gifts are you going to share with your loved one this Valentines Day?
Michael Twomey is a successful Personal Coach in
NYC. Using many effective and creative ways, from Energy work to Hypnosis
and NLP, Michael specializes in heightening Romantic Relationships, and
helping people to become more confident and connect with others.
To schedule sessions you can call: 917.623.2352 or email him at:Mike2velli@aol.com
(c) Copyright - Michael Twomey 2005. All rights reserved!